BY MIA HUELSBECK/APRIL 19, 2023 9:00 AM
Tom Cruise began acting in 1981, but it wasn’t until 1986 that he got his big break with “Top Gun,” which launched him into stardom. Since then, just about every aspect of his life has been scrutinized, from his romantic relationships to his very public meltdowns – and of course, his involvement with the Church of Scientology. Despite the Hollywood actor’s infectious charisma, there have been moments that led to speculation over whether Cruise is as authentic as he seems.
One major element that the public noticed has been missing from his life for many years now is his relationship with his daughter, Suri Cruise. Cruise and Katie Holmes got together in 2005, and they welcomed their only child together (Cruise’s third child), Suri, on April 18, 2006. They married a few months later, but it wasn’t meant to last. Holmes filed for divorce in 2012, and since then, Cruise’s relationship with Suri has been rocky at best.
Over the years, Suri grew up in the spotlight and has been spotted countless times with her “Dawson’s Creek” alum mother. Now that she’s 16, it’s obvious the person who’s been largely out of the picture, literally and figuratively, is her father. Cruise continues to make movies, speak to the press, and walk the red carpet without so much as mentioning Suri, and it’s become clear: There is no relationship between the two. Don’t believe us? Then here are ten signs that Tom Cruise is estranged from his daughter Suri.
Katie Holmes has full custody of SuriJames Devaney/Getty ImagesIn June of 2012, it was officially announced that Tom Cruise and Katie Holmes were splitting up after five years of marriage. Some theorized that when Holmes cited “irreconcilable differences” as the reason for filing for divorce, it was due to their 16-year age difference, while others determined Cruise’s affiliation with the Church of Scientology was the main motivating factor. Neither of these speculations were confirmed, but it was noted that Holmes filed in New York rather than California, as it’s believed New York courts tend to lean towards granting one parent custody, rather than joint custody.
A source told the Daily Mail, “Katie will not be relegated to a secondary role in her daughter’s life, period, and she is prepared to fight Tom in court. Katie isn’t going to back down, and she will do whatever it takes to ensure that she raises Suri herself.” And that’s exactly what she did. After being awarded sole custody of Suri (who was 6 years old at the time) and $400,000 a month in child support, Holmes picked up and moved out of California with her daughter.
At the time, Holmes’ attorney told People, “Katie’s primary concern remains, as it always has been, her daughter’s best interest.” Meanwhile, Cruise’s rep said, “Tom is deeply saddened and is concentrating on his three children. ” But it would seem that if Cruise truly wanted to concentrate on Suri, he would have fought harder for custody.
Tom Cruise became absent when he divorced Katie HolmesInstagramAfter their bitter divorce, Katie Holmes continued to parent Suri and Tom Cruise visited his daughter. But in September of 2013, Cruise was questioned under oath in a deposition intended to determine whether he had been an absent father. In the deposition, he admitted that there had been a 110 day period where he hadn’t seen his daughter.
According to RadarOnline, the attorney probed Cruise on the amount of time he spent with his daughter in the months following his and Holmes’ split. Cruise confirmed that between June and November of 2012, he only saw Suri for around 10 days. However, within those months he also flew internationally to attend a Scientology conference because, “I felt it was important,” he said. When asked why he could spend time at the church but not with Suri, Cruise said, “Listen, when there is a divorce … things change. And it’s more complicated, as everyone knows when that is, when that occurs, and there are certain agreements; now you have to ask for permission and organize schedules to make things happen. So it wasn’t — it’s not an ideal scene. It’s not an ideal situation.”
He recounted telling stories on the phone to his daughter, but agreed that it’s not the same as in-person visits. He concluded by saying, “Certainly what doesn’t change is the love I have for my daughter.” Despite his heartfelt sentiment, Cruise eventually stopped seeing his daughter altogether.
They haven’t been seen publicly together since 2013TwitterJust days after settling the lawsuit Tom Cruise recorded his deposition for and one year after his divorce from Katie Holmes, he took Suri Cruise to Disney World in December of 2013. It is believed that because Holmes took Suri to Ohio over Thanksgiving, Cruise got to spend Christmas with his 7-year-old daughter. They were joined by Connor Cruise, Tom Cruise’s adopted son from his previous marriage to Nicole Kidman. But was this just a publicity stunt for the “Mission Impossible” actor?
Cruise didn’t shy away from the cameras that captured every moment of the two playing together at Disney World’s water park. So, it would seem that he wanted to be seen as the loving, doting father he claimed to be, given the lawsuit he had just wrapped was over claims that he had “abandoned” Suri. The saddest part that might be a sign Cruise and Suri are estranged, though, is that this was the last time the father and daughter duo were photographed together in public.
In the decade since, Suri Cruise has grown up and transformed into a remarkable young lady who bears a striking resemblance to Holmes. The mother and daughter pair are frequently photographed together every time they leave the house, so if Cruise were around for a visit, the paparazzi probably would have captured the moment.
Their estrangement might have stemmed from Tom Cruise’s religionClive Mason/Getty ImagesTom Cruise has been one of the most recognizable faces of Scientology for years. The rumors around how the church impacts his personal life aren’t anything new, but there may be some truth to them. Page Six interviewed ex-Scientologist and actress Leah Remini, who said Cruise is “considered a deity within Scientology. He is second to David Miscavige, the savior of the free world.” With this level of notoriety within the church, his estrangement from Suri begins to make sense.
Remini also spoke with the New York Post about what she thought was going on between Cruise and Suri. “Scientology considers Katie a suppressive person which is an enemy and therefore Tom believes, like all Scientologists, that he can’t be connected to Suri,” she said.
Tony Ortega, a Scientology critic, told Us Weekly that there was likely “some nondisclosure agreement saying she wouldn’t say anything bad about Scientology.” He added, “She wanted to get away and she wanted to get Suri.” Suri had been attending a Scientology-influenced school and was approaching her first “audit,” where questions are asked to help eliminate negative influences in a Scientologist’s life. When Holmes received sole custody, she was put in charge of Suri’s religious upbringing and education, and she soon enrolled Suri in a Catholic school. Cruise has made his priorities clear (Scientology first, everything else comes second), so it wouldn’t be surprising if his devotion to Scientology outweighs his dedication to Suri.
Suri lives in New York with her mom
Looking at the pictures of the mother and daughter walking together around New York, it’s undeniable that Suri is Katie Holmes’ mini me. After her divorce, Holmes ditched the California mansion she shared with Tom Cruise and moved to the East coast with Suri in tow. They settled on an apartment in Chelsea that cost $12,500 a month (which was plausibly funded by Cruise’s child support money). Then a few years later in 2015, they moved into a penthouse apartment in the same neighborhood that cost an incredible $25,000 a month. As Holmes told Insider in 2022, “What I love about New York is that for me and my child, this is our vibe.” And since Cruise is paying, they might as well live it up.
Now a full-fledged teenager, Suri has been applying to colleges to study fashion, and a source told the Daily Mail that she’s planning on staying put in New York City. They said, “Suri is applying to schools all over the place. [Katie] really does want her to stay in New York so they can be close to each other.” They added that, “Being raised by a single mom in New York has made Suri who she is. Katie has always put Suri first and Suri loves her mom more than anything.” With Cruise still absent, it’s no wonder that Suri isn’t considering going to college back in California where her dad would be.
Tom Cruise still makes time to see his son
Tom Cruise and “Big Little Lies” actress Nicole Kidman were married from 1990 until 2001, during which they adopted two children: Connor and Isabella Cruise. Connor is Tom Cruise’s only son and he was adopted shortly after being born. Connor has followed his father’s footsteps into acting for a time and, of course, into the Church of Scientology. It’s reported that he’s still practicing the religion today, so it’s understandable why they’d still be on good terms.
After Cruise and Kidman got divorced, Connor and Isabella reportedly decided to live with their dad. Kidman later married Keith Urban and had two children, and the distance between her and her adopted children grew. At one point, she told the Daily Mail, “They live with Tom, which was their choice. I’d love them to live with us, but what can you do?”
Today Connor lives a lowkey life, but he’s been photographed with Cruise on multiple occasions. In 2019, they were spotted together in London, with a source telling People, “Tom and Connor stepping out together in London was a big deal. It was the same weekend that Scientology does their annual gathering called the International Association of Scientologists. Tom has attended numerous times in the past, but this appears to be the first time Connor has gone.” They were also seen at a baseball game together in 2021. So clearly, Cruise has time for some of his kids — just not Suri.
He removed Suri from his Christmas cards
In 2005, a feud erupted between Tom Cruise and actress Brooke Shields after she stated she took antidepressants after she had her first child, as she had been suffering from postpartum depression. In an interview with Today, Cruise addressed his criticism of Shields saying, “I really care about Brooke Shields … I want to see her do well, and I know that psychiatry is a pseudoscience.” He continued to back up his points in the infamous interview, but he and Shields reportedly buried the hatchet and moved on.
Shields told People that she had been invited to Cruise and Katie Holmes’ wedding in 2006 and that she’d been a giftee of Cruise’s renowned Christmas cake for ten years. It became a tradition when he and Holmes were together, and every holiday season, they would send their celebrity friends an expensive coconut Bundt cake. Shields also noted that he had removed Suri from the Christmas cards he would send. She said, “It was from them and Suri, so it was the three of them, and then soon it was no Suri and no Katie and just Tom. Then it went from just Tom for a while, but not every holiday. And then the cake stopped.” If ending the tradition he began with his then-wife and daughter and then removing Suri from the Christmas cards isn’t telling enough of their estranged relationship, then we don’t know what is.
A media outlet published that Tom Cruise abandoned Suri
The 2005 deposition Tom Cruise gave was for more than proving he wasn’t an absent father to Suri. It was also part of a defamation lawsuit he filed against Bauer Publishing Group, which published stories in their Life & Style and InTouch magazines about Cruise abandoning Suri after his divorce from Katie Holmes. One headline read “Suri in Tears, Abandoned by Her Dad,” while another said, “44 Days Without Tom … Abandoned by Daddy.”
A Bauer Publishing representative told CNN, “This litigation has established that the editorial teams had a wealth of evidence substantiating that following his divorce from Ms. Holmes, Mr. Cruise was absent from his daughter for long periods of time, that seeing her was not his first priority and that she was emotionally struggling as a result of her father’s extended absences … Mr. Cruise has repeatedly promoted himself as being a devoted father who made his family his top priority. Now, with his own admissions, it is clear that the picture he strives to paint is not accurate.”
Cruise maintained that he had never abandoned his daughter, saying, “I’m sure my daughter misses me when I am not with her (as I miss her), she is a very happy child, and we have a wonderful relationship and cheerful phone calls,” he said. Sure, tabloids can exaggerate, but seeing how Cruise’s relationship with Suri has played out since, they were well ahead of the curve.
Katie Holmes has had to parent Suri as a single mom
Although she’s dated a little bit since her divorce, having ties to Jamie Foxx, Emilio Vitolo Jr., and Bobby Wooten III over the years, Katie Holmes has never remarried and continues to parent Suri as a single mother. The child support Tom Cruise pays no doubt helps, but without him in the picture, Holmes has learned to rely on those closest to her while raising Suri.
She told People that her supportive mother “is always willing to fly to me if I need her, and even when I don’t.” Holmes has also said that her friends who have kids have also been a significant source of support, saying, “I lean on them. For advice, for recipes, for all of that stuff: ‘What am I supposed to do? Can you come over and watch? Can you be a helping hand?’ And I do have help, yes, but … it’s your baby, you know? You want to be the one who is there.” And if you ask us, those last words couldn’t be more pointed.
Holmes also spoke to Elle about the overwhelming support, saying, “So many people I didn’t know became my friends and helped us out, and that’s what I love about the city.” Cruise’s absence has undoubtedly been difficult to deal with, but Holmes has managed to raise Suri into the beautiful young woman she is today, and all without the “Top Gun” star.
Tom Cruise might be waiting to get in touch until Suri is older
Joe Maher & Joe Maher/Getty, Instagram
At this rate, it’s assumed that Suri and Tom Cruise may never have a relationship after being estranged for so many years, and with Suri thriving without him. But, ex-Scientologist Leah Remini has raised a concerning point while speaking with the New York Post. As a past member of the church, she has a solid understanding of the inner workings of Scientology, and has spent nearly a decade raising awareness around the church’s alleged abuses. Remini said, “I knew Katie when she was in [Scientology] and she seemed very indoctrinated into Tom’s world. But as time went on, and I understood why she did what she did to protect her daughter … I’m only assuming that there’s some type of agreement to protect her daughter.”
Remini continued that she believes Cruise might get in touch with Suri when she’s older. “I’m sure his master plan is to wait until Suri gets older so that he can lure her into Scientology and away from her mother,” she said. Her opinion of Cruise is clear, having said he’s “not a good person” and “continues to sit by and watch people’s lives get destroyed,” but her points are worthy of merit. After all, she was raised in the church from the age of 9, and has witnessed many of the goings on within.
With that said, whether Suri and Cruise remain estranged is hard to say, and only time will tell.
